The Documentary Blues
Have you ever watched a really compelling documentary and then just felt really depressed afterwards? That happens to me sometimes. One night after watching a climate change documentary I went to sleep really anxious and woke up a few hours later in kind of a daze. I felt frustrated and discouraged with humanity and particularly the little choice I had in the matter. If my future was in the hands of politicians and corporations, I was screwed.
Climate Clock: New York City- Indicating how much time we have left until we reach irreversible climate damage
I closed my eyes and saw the core of the earth pulsating. It was calm, hot, and nourishing. A wave of deep peace entered me as I sat amongst the vibrating life force. I then remembered my anxiety, and the information that plagued me about my future. My body tensed. I saw the water rising, fish covered in oil, garbage wastelands and hungry children.
“Is it true? 7 years?” I asked the pulsating red heartbeat.
“It is a possibility.” Said a warm voice.
“What is the point to bring children into this world then?”
“It is also possible you will leave today.. or tomorrow… or in a thousand years. The images you see of destruction and pain, that is always there. It always will be there. I have many faces.”
A wave of serenity hit me
“Ultimately.” She said, “It is I who decide. You are mortal and yes you will die. This planet is mortal and yes it will die. Yet, death is not permanent.”
“Do we have any choice in the matter? As to when?”
“On this planet, you have choice, my child. That’s what makes this place so special. That is why we are talking right now.”
I was then shown the forests, the mountains, the rivers, oceans and streams. She showed me the four leggeds, the two leggeds and the creepy crawlers that lived on the land. She showed me her skies, her mountaintops and the rain that the winged ones soared through. I saw the gilled ones and the colourful creatures who lived in the water realm.
Then she showed me her fire. I saw the storms, the fires, the volcanic eruptions, the earth quakes and the hurricanes. I saw creatures of all shapes and sizes running from her and to her for cover.
“I too destroy. I too take. I too give. I too receive.”
“What I am today I am not tomorrow. That number is both irrelevant and relevant. You know what to do.”
As I batted my eyelashes and returned to my body I felt a sense of peace, slowness and tranquility. There is choice. For me, my choice resides in my faith and my spirituality.
I don’t know what the next 7 years will look like, nor do I know what will happen once that clock hits. I know it’s been a weird couple of years though and I sometimes we just have to have to laugh at it all.
Because in the end we all die.
That, my friend is a guaranteed part of living.
